February 2, 2016

Tomas Tricks

Never mind the horrible lighting or the crying baby who did not appreciate me trying to video this trick of his.  Little stinker has been doing this for a couple weeks now.



His adjusted age the first time was only 2.5 weeks ...  I'm thinking we probably won't be needing to adjust his age for much of anything in the future.

January 29, 2016

A Disturbing Parenting Trend

There is no denying that the world has changed since Aidan was a baby.  Carseats, vaccines, and infant feeding all have different recommendations and in some cases, new laws.   There is another area of change, however, and this is the one that disturbs me the most:  covering up while breastfeeding in public.

When Aidan was born there was a big nurse-in at our local Target after an employee asked a mom to nurse somewhere else.  Moms came together in a smallish city to make a statement about breastfeeding rights.  When I, as a new first time mom, felt uncomfortable nursing in public it was other moms encouraging me not to worry about covering up and taught me about which types of shirts, bras, and slings might help me feel more comfortable.  I'm so grateful no one told me I had to stay home, rather than nurse in public, when I was a vulnerable young mom.

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I look like I needed some more sleep, but probably not advice on covering up.

January 24, 2016

The End of...Well Something


Today marks the end of Tim's paternity leave.  Tomorrow he will go to work for the first time since the day after we were discharged from the NICU.   8 whole weeks with his almost uninterrupted help and support.  He's cooked and cleaned and wrangled big kids and let me take breaks whenever I needed.  Being my absolute rock in moments of struggle.

Tomorrow is the end of all of that.  Well, I mean Tim will still be my amazing supportive rock...he'll just have to do it in those rare moments when the children are sleeping before we collapse into bed exhausted.

But really tomorrow feels bigger than that.  Somehow tangibly ending something much longer than 8 weeks.

Tomorrow feels like the day that for better or worse I am in charge again.

Well as in charge as any one person ever can be.

January 22, 2016

In Event of a New Baby Order Immediately

In the event that you find yourself with a new baby, I cannot highly enough recommend one of these.

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It is called a Kylee.

January 19, 2016

Siena's Birthday Photos

On Siena's birthday we celebrated as a family by having donuts for breakfast from the local bakery and then visiting the cemetary to bring flowers and release floating lanterns.  It was a quiet day and we all shared a few moments remembering our baby girl.  I'll update on her birthday bash fundraiser soon, but for now here are some photos from our day.

Siena's First Birthday


January 18, 2016

Swaddle Baths or What I DID Learn in the NICU

I've been pretty negative about our time in the NICU, and especially in the step down nursery.  Let's be honest, I was hormonal and I wanted to go home with my baby.  But lest you think I am not willing to admit when someone manages to teach this old dog a new trick I want to tell you about the swaddle bath.


There are rules for everything in the NICU, including how often a baby gets a bath.   Tomas' first bath was so hated that I actually asked if we could skip the second "scheduled" one because really... why does he need to be this upset if he's not really dirty?  The only good thing about his first bath was he was so made he got his CPAP hat wet and blew his IV and they decided to take both off.

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January 14, 2016

Inadequate Words

All of the words I have as we celebrate one year without our sweet Siena are inadequate to truly express her place in this family.  The last year has been filled with many ups and downs and we have struggled to find a new normal that does not include this sweet girl with us each day.  There are many who have come alongside us and shared in those ups and downs.  Relationships have been tested.  Some have been strengthened and others have fallen away.   New relationships have been forged.  This is a trend I know will continue into the next year of our lives as well.

We have, at times, faced criticism for our decisions to carry Siena to term, to remember her in the ways that we have/do, and to be open to Tomas' life so shortly after her own.  

I can say with confidence, however, that I have no regrets.

Tears have fallen, and more will fall, but through tears comes the love and laughter that will keep Siena in the heart of this family for all of the years to come.

#SienaStrong forever.

via Pinterest