For my husband Tim and I, grieving our many losses together has changed over the past sixteen years. Our first miscarriage took place in my parents basement. A young couple only a few months into our marriage, we oddly invited a friend over to keep Tim company watching the Minnesota Twins play October baseball while I spent most of the night in the bathroom. It wasn’t that Tim was uninvolved or remotely unsupportive, but we did make some strange decisions that first loss!
Fast forward thirteen years and when our daughter Siena died shortly after death, Tim was fully involved in every step. He slept at the hospital in the days after delivery, called the funeral home, chose a burial plot, and took three weeks of leave from work to be with me. He did this while keeping track of what was happening at home with our other five children so I didn’t have to!